Preventing Separation Anxiety

Leaving a child with a babysitter or in child care can sometimes be stressful for both parent and child. For the child, the fear related to the parent leaving his or her sight is called separation anxiety. Similarly, most parents will experience separation anxiety to some degree when they have to leave their children.

Most children will experience separation anxiety to some degree. It is most common between 6 months and 2 years of age. Separation anxiety is a normal part of development when children start understanding more about people and places.

If your child starts to have trouble when you drop her off at child care or with a babysitter there are several things you can do to help.

• Do not discuss the separation before it occurs. Doing so will not help. It may make separating more difficult.
• Plan ahead so that you can separate quickly. Have all of your child's things together in one bag or her toys out in one place so that you won't drag out the separation.
• When it comes time to do so, leave as quickly and as matter-of-factly as possible.
• If separating is hard for you, set up times to practice separating. For example, arrange to drop your child off at a friend's or relative's house several times each week for a short time until it becomes easier for you.
• When you pick your child up, don't be overly emotional. It's OK to act glad to see her, but don't start crying and hugging her too much. This only shows your child how hard the separation was for you.
• Generally the way children handle separation is a direct reflection of how their parents handle it. Do well and your child will do much better.