Dressing Problems: Poking, Stalling

Once your child has shown the skills necessary to dress himself, it is reasonable to expect him to do so within a specific amount of time (for example, 20 minutes) every morning. The following guidelines can help you deal with poking or stalling.

1. Make sure your child is capable of completing the task you are asking him to do. Preschool-age children may occasionally need some assistance.
2. Establish a morning routine. For example, get up, go to the bathroom, get dressed, make the bed, and eat breakfast. This will help your child know what you expect on a daily basis.
3. Allow your child enough time (20 to 30 minutes before breakfast) to get dressed.
4. Initially, praise your child very frequently for dressing. "Catch 'em being good" (dressing appropriately) as often as possible.
5. Ignore stalling. Don't nag.
6. Use time-out for each tantrum.
7. Do not allow the T.V. to be turned on until after your child is completely dressed.
8. Remember to praise any appropriate dressing behavior often. Check on your child every 2 to 5 minutes.
9. Have breakfast ready after the 20-minute dressing time.
10. If your child is completely dressed in the time allowed, praise her and have her go eat breakfast. Reward her with 10 to 15 minutes of your time doing whatever she would like to do (play a game, read a story, etc.) after she gets home from school, or immediately if she is not going to school.
11. If your child does not complete dressing in the time you have allowed, have him stay in his room to finish dressing.

    If your child must go to school and is not dressed by 5 to 10 minutes before it is time to leave, dress him, but don't talk to him except to give instructions.

    Regardless of whether your child finishes dressing 2 or 30 minutes past the time you have allowed, he has not finished in time to eat breakfast. Although it's terribly hard to send your child to school without breakfast, he won't starve. After you do this once or twice, your child will start getting dressed within the allowed amount of time. (You may want to call the school to briefly explain the situation.)

12. Don't give in, and remember to praise all appropriate dressing behaviors.